Pudsey Bear
Full Member
- Messages
- 10,114
Mum, how is it possible that you told me the human
race was created by God and Dad said it developed
from monkeys?"
Well, darling,' said the mother, 'it's very simple. I
told you about my side of the family and your father
told you about his.'
What do you call an intelligent, handsome, sensitive
man?
- A rumour.
What should you give a man who has everything?
- A woman to show him how to work it.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
- Because breasts don't have eyes.
With the casino virtually deserted, the two male
dealers at the craps table were idling away their
time. Then suddenly an attractive woman appeared
and said that she wanted to bet twenty thousand
dollars on a single roll of the dice.
'Certainly, madam,' they said, happy to relieve
the boredom.
you don't mind, but playing topless always brings
"There's just one thing though,' she added. 'I hope
me luck. So as there's hardly anyone about, would
you mind if I took my top and bra off?"
So she removed her top and her bra, threw the
dice and yelled: I've won! I've won! I can't believe
it!' Then she scooped up the money, picked up her
clothes and left.
The two dealers were stunned. 'What did she roll
anyway?" asked one.
'I don't know,' said the other. I thought you were
watching the dice!'
race was created by God and Dad said it developed
from monkeys?"
Well, darling,' said the mother, 'it's very simple. I
told you about my side of the family and your father
told you about his.'
What do you call an intelligent, handsome, sensitive
man?
- A rumour.
What should you give a man who has everything?
- A woman to show him how to work it.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
- Because breasts don't have eyes.
With the casino virtually deserted, the two male
dealers at the craps table were idling away their
time. Then suddenly an attractive woman appeared
and said that she wanted to bet twenty thousand
dollars on a single roll of the dice.
'Certainly, madam,' they said, happy to relieve
the boredom.
you don't mind, but playing topless always brings
"There's just one thing though,' she added. 'I hope
me luck. So as there's hardly anyone about, would
you mind if I took my top and bra off?"
So she removed her top and her bra, threw the
dice and yelled: I've won! I've won! I can't believe
it!' Then she scooped up the money, picked up her
clothes and left.
The two dealers were stunned. 'What did she roll
anyway?" asked one.
'I don't know,' said the other. I thought you were
watching the dice!'