Anyway

[Pudsey Bear]

A girl took her boyfriend back to her house and said:

Mum, is it okay if we go up to my room?

Sure, 'said the mother. You kids have fun.'

Shortly afterwards, the mother heard: 'Baby, baby,

baby, oh!'

She rushed upstairs, opened the door to her

daughter's room and yelled: 'What the hell's going on?"

We were just having sex,' explained the daughter.

Thank God!' said the mother. I thought for a

minute you were listening to Justin Bieber!'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man sitting in a bar asked the bartender: How late

does the band play?"

The bartender replied: 'About a half-beat behind

the drummer.'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What's the definition of a gentleman?

Someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but

doesn't.

 

[marchie]

A girl took her boyfriend back to her house and said:

Mum, is it okay if we go up to my room?

Sure, 'said the mother. You kids have fun.'

Shortly afterwards, the mother heard: 'Baby, baby,

baby, oh!'

She rushed upstairs, opened the door to her

daughter's room and yelled: 'What the hell's going on?"

We were just having sex,' explained the daughter.

Thank God!' said the mother. I thought for a

minute you were listening to Justin Bieber!'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man sitting in a bar asked the bartender: How late

does the band play?"

The bartender replied: 'About a half-beat behind

the drummer.'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What's the definition of a gentleman?

Someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but

doesn't.

'Zip yourself up again, you deaf old bugger. I said I'd like to get my hands on your sax and make the earth move ...'

Steve