Weather Report..................

The snow and frost is all gone and its a dry 2 degrees so far. We passed central Blackpool yesterday with its Christmas market and fair and it was as busy as mid summer. There are plenty of hardy folk about!
 
It snowed last night...
8:00 am: I made a snowman.

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .

8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from BBC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.

By noon it all melted

Moral:

There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes
 
Two snowmen talking, and the one says to the other, 'Here, can you taste coal?' His mate replies, 'No, but I can smell carrots' :ROFLMAO:

Santa has a new addition to the Sled Team this year, Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Reindeer. Runs as fast as Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer, but can't stop as quickly ... :rolleyes:

And ladies; if a bewhiskered old man, dressed in a red suit slips something in your stocking late on Xmas Eve, you've been visited by Father Christmas. If it happens again on Christmas Evening, you've been groped by a Chelsea Pensioner ... :ROFLMAO:

Steve
 
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